I am Missed…..This was written a year ago as the start to my book. It explains exactly where I was January 1, 2015. I hadn’t been to sleep yet as I was in Scotland and it was Hogmanay. For those that don’t know what Hogmanay is it is the ringing in of the bells and the first foot over the door of those you love. The feelings of this are still with me today, but the things that have changed are my strength, my knowledge and my absolute determination to help those that are missed or missing.
Christmas is around the corner, one of the hardest times of the year for me. But with that I know I am not alone and I hope you know neither are you. I have my knight in shining armour by my side, and when the days are dark he shows me the light. This Christmas, in my heart I am walking thru your doors, please know you are missed and I missed you.
I missed you every day.
I missed you every single day.
Did you know that?
Did you know that I missed you so much that there were no words to describe the gaping, aching unstoppable pain?
Did you know that? Did you know that I missed every part of you, every day, and every day again? Over and over. Days went past, months and then a year and then years.
But the days went by and the ache didn’t. The loss never left.
So one day, I just stopped missing you.
You might ask me why one day.
I hope we get that chance….
All I can say is that if I kept missing you, I might lose my mind. And then what if one day, one miraculous day you came back. But in those days, months and years of missing you, I had lost myself.
And then what if I missed you because I had lost me. That would be the ultimate loss for both of us. So I just had to stop. And, so, I stopped.
I am missed, I am this Woman